Apparently, my children are going to alternate their stages of terrible two-dom. Excellent in that we never have two mini hoodlums at once. Sucky in that there is always one tiny tyrant in my house. Emma first hated (and I mean haaaaaaaaaated) getting dressed in the mornings. Then James hated everything at dinner time. Now he is over that and Emma has begun a mad love affair with pens.
Pens. Like ballpoint ink pens. 85% of the time, she uses them to scribble on random scraps of paper she finds. It’s actually kind of cute because she acts like she is writing notes to people as we dictate. ”Dear Gamma, I luff you. Luff, Emma.” The remain 15% of the time is shared between writing in books, on furniture or her skin. And that is the “no me gusta” part. Tim and I have decided to wean her off of the inky smack she’s addicted to by completely denying the existence of pens when she is most likely to use their powers for evil (and also looking into washable markers and those invisible magic marker dohickeys).
That explanation was to set up this conversation between two grown-ups and a 2 year old.
Emma: I need PEN.
Me: Sorry, we don’t have any pens.
Emma: (wailing) Mommy, mommy, mommy, mommy, mommy!
Me: Emmy, Emmy, Emmy,Emmy,Emmy,Emmy.
Emma: Mommy, NO!
Me: (in an attempt to distract her) Emma, did you have a good day today with Mrs. Bekah?
Emma: NO, Mommy!
Daddy: Did you read any books?
Emma: DADDY, NO!
Me: Did you play with Linus the puppy?
Emma: NO NO!
Daddy: Did you color any pictures?
Emma: Daddy, NO!
Me: Did you take a nap?
Emma: Mommy, NO!
Daddy: Did you eat lunch?
Emma: NO DADDY!
*Cue us cracking up because she was so adamant that she did NOTHING all day and her life was over because of the lack of pens in her grubby little fingers*
Me & Daddy: AHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAH!
Emma: You’re not funny.
Oh contrare, wee one. I’m pretty sure I am hilarious!
3 Responses to “Actually, I think I’m hilarious”
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